Operation Lit Side

🚀 Dark Side of the Moon…

The barren landscape of the Moon's dark side stretched endlessly under the cold glow of distant stars. Craters pockmarked the surface, untouched by time—except for the few that had become makeshift storage units for Rattok’s failed “science experiments” (which nobody dared to investigate).

Nestled within the largest crater stood Moonbase Albino, an alien outpost of questionable engineering, inhabited by four very different and deeply confused aliens.

👽 

Fini: "We've lived here for years! Don’t you want to see what’s over there?"

Angry: (folds arms) "No. Absolutely not."

Uncle Earnie: (rubbing his chin) "Might be worth checkin’ out."

Rattok: (twitching excitedly) "IF THERE IS DANGER, I ACCEPT IT."

Angry: (sighs) "Fine. But if it’s boring, I’m never leaving the base again."

🌕 The Light Side… And an Unexpected Discovery

Crossing the terminator—the line between perpetual darkness and harsh, blinding sunlight—the crew shielded their eyes.

Fini: "Ow, ow, ow—WHO TURNED THE LIGHT UP TO A THOUSAND?!"

Earnie: "No place should be this bright. It's creepy."

Rattok: "THE LIGHT... IT BURNS MY SOUL."

Angry: "You don’t have a soul."

💩

They stumbled forward until they saw it.

Right in the middle of this lunar wasteland, a collection of small white bags lay… neatly arranged… full of… something.

Fini: (gasping) "OH MY STARS! A MESSAGE FROM ANOTHER INTELLIGENT SPECIES!"

Earnie: (kneeling, inspecting) "Smells… earthy. Familiar."

Rattok: (picking one up) "I SHALL TASTE IT TO DISCOVER ITS PURPOSE!"

Angry: (slapping it out of his hands) "DO NOT."

🚩 

Then, just beyond the strange offerings, they saw it—A FLAG. And, most disturbingly—it was waving.

Angry: "Alright. That’s not right. No wind. No air. No reason for it to move."

Earnie: "It’s got some symbol… greenish stripes… blue square… white shapes… Who left this?"

Fini: (still fixated on the bags) "Wait. What if this isn’t a message? What if—"

🧐 

Angry: "What if what?"

Fini: "...What if they left their bodily waste on our doorstep?"

Rattok: (stunned) "...ARE YOU TELLING ME… THIS IS A PRANK?"

Earnie: "They came here, stomped around, left their filth, and just—left!"

Angry: "Unbelievable. Some primitive species came here, defiled our Moon, and left like cowards?! This is an outrage!"

💩  🚀

With great ceremony, the crew gathered every bag and debated the best way to return it.

Fini: "Do we hurl it back at that blue-green planet?"

Earnie: "Maybe load it into a rocket?"

Rattok: "OR WE COULD MULTIPLY IT AND FLOOD THEIR WORLD WITH—"

Angry: "NO."

🪧

They stacked all the bags into a giant tower.

They planted a sign in front:

WE FOUND YOUR TRASH. CLEAN UP AFTER YOURSELVES, BARBARIANS.

And, for extra impact…

Rattok: (flinging a bag at the flag) 🎯 Direct hit.

🚀 

As they stood back, admiring their act of revenge, they turned toward the ugly blue-green planet.

Angry: "Whoever they are… they will remember this day."

Fini: "Think they'll come back?"

Earnie: "If they do, they'd better bring better gifts."

Rattok: (grinning) "NEXT TIME, WE THROW IT BACK WITH INTEREST."

With that, the aliens turned and walked back into the darkness, proud of their first encounter with humanity.

Somewhere on Earth, generations later, scientists would still argue about the mysterious lunar waste pile, never realizing the real story.

The first interstellar diplomatic response… was made of poop.

🚀 The End… or Just the Beginning? 💩